Beware cheap imitations!

This may be one of the weirdest things that has happened to me in recent memory.

So, occasionally I have people that pretend to be me. It happens. They generally either just take bits and pieces of my profile, pictures, display name, etc. Some try to play it off as if they ARE me and others just use my words/pictures and pretend they did them. Usually it makes me laugh a bit. There was one that impersonated me and tried to con my employees out of money, pretending like they were me and I was in a RL emergency. Thankfully none of them fell for that and that account has since been banned.

Anyways. Yesterday I was standing around on a platform in the sky, as one does, and a girl that used to work for me and now manages another club IMs me. She lets me know that a friend of hers has copy/pasted one of my picks and the only reason they knew she was doing it is because the person in question hadn’t removed my e-mail address. Let’s call the impersonator FAKELILY from here on out.

I get a bit of a laugh out of it and go to look at the profile. Sure enough, one of the picks is directly ripped from my profile. And recently as well since I’d just updated that pick on Friday and my new edits where used. I laughed a bit and clicked another pick. And there was her e-mail. “Send all giftcards to slutfallen@______.com”. I blink.

That’s not my e-mail address. I mean, yes, that IS my SecondLife name, but that is not now, nor has ever been my e-mail address. I never made that or used it. I certainly never typed it out for her to copy since well. It’s not my e-mail address. Then it dawns on me. She must have made it. She made herself an e-mail address…using my SecondLife name. I… what. WHAT?

I do a bit more digging. I send her an e-mail, where she denies having any idea who I am. She forgot to change her name on the e-mail so I looked them up on Facebook. I won’t disclose any RL information on them, but we’ll say I was a bit surprised that their RL Facebook also has my name on it. I look at their SL Facebook profile. It says they work in Vegas, live in Dallas. I was born and raised in Vegas. Live in Dallas.

I………what.

At this point, it’s creepy but there’s nothing I can do about it. It’s not like my name is copyrighted and there’s nothing I have of them directly claiming to BE me. I did message the owner of the club she works at now, as well as one she is applying to, to let them know about the situation. My concern isn’t that she’s using my pick. Or, was. She has since changed it. But rather that that e-mail addresss uses a name of mine that is fairly well known in some areas of SL. I don’t want people e-mailing her or giving her gifts thinking she is me. I’m not sure what her intent with all of this is. I’m just stumped.

os7m1sc

Back Again?

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So, hey. It’s been what, close to a year since I wrote? I know, I know. That’s not unusual. I tend to take breaks now and then. But I realized recently that I miss writing. I miss just babbling about nonsense and posting pics and the occasional OOTD. So. Here I am!

2017. Babygirls just recently celebrated our 2nd Anniversary. The club is still going strong, and is better than ever. It’s self sufficient, and then some. We average between 80 and 110 employees, though over the summer at one point we had 130! We have some great ideas we’re going to implement moving forward, and I’m really excited for them. I think it will only improve things ever more!

DJ is…well and completely gone. He contacted me once in the last 6 months or so on Twitter telling me he’s working on his site again and asking if we can do some cross promoting/advertising, but I never heard from him again. Probably for the best since he’s not exactly what I’d call reliable. *shrugs*

We have a Fetish/BDSM party coming up this Friday, which is what the above pic is for, and I hope it goes well. We do themed events every Friday now, with DJ Emi on from 7pm-9pm SLT. And sometimes they’re packed. We’ve had to rez out more tipjars for all the girls!

I’m going to try to update the look of this blog this week too cuz…damn. Its not cute. lol.

Spring Lily

I know. It’s been a LONG time since I’ve posted here. And it’s been even LONGER since I did any sort of OotD post. But, I am in love with how adorable I am right now. I’m even MORE in love with the fact that I finally got a new computer and can see! Taking pictures is a whole new experience like this. I couldn’t really use shadows or anythings fancy before. Now there’s so much new stuff to play with and figure out. So, after getting dressed yesterday, these two pictures happened:

 

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Good Kinda Tired.

Ok. After my whining post, I felt better. I got it out of my system. Then I did actually get some cuddles, surprisingly. And, maybe a tad bit more. Ended up going to bed in a pretty good mood.

When I logged on tonight I fucked around doing nothing for a bit, then shit got busy. Hired 4 times in a row. lol. By the time I was done, I was feeling pretty exhausted, but accomplished. You never know when shit is going to get busy. Two of them were even threesomes, which turned out to be pretty fun.

After that I got to relax a bit and watch some “Adult Legos” which is always nice. I dunno. It’s something I always kind of look forward to. It really is amazingly relaxing, and hey, the company isn’t terrible either.

Now I’m not sure what I wanna do with myself. I can’t decide if I wanna go to bed “early”. Well, early for me. Or fuck around for a bit longer. There’s a DJ playing so I’m listening to that a bit and idling around in my bedroom on the sim. Not a terrible way to round out my night.

One of those days again.

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I am just in one of those kinds of moods today. I’m not even really sure why. I just felt…. vaguely overwhelmed. I was thinking about too much all at once. It’s not even being overwhelmed by things I can’t do, or can’t handle. It was just allll of it coming to mind at once instead of broken down into segments. And it set my mind racing for a bit.

Then I just wanted to… be comforted I guess? I feel absolutely girly today. I just want to be comforted and held and cuddled and complimented. I want affection and playfulness and to feel special. I wanted to be able to turn to someone and go off and vent. Or, not vent at all and just say “I need you.” And have it happen.

To be fair, I may have been able to do that. I’m not really sure. And that’s part of it too. I don’t know how much I can ask for when it comes to emotional stuff. Or when emotional things are ok. I WANT more. Oh so much more. But for now, it’s just not something I feel like I can do. I don’t feel like I’m in a place where I can ask for it. I’m not completely sure where I stand or what is ok. Or what isn’t. Or what would be alright but may make them uncomfortable. I KNOW I can ask for help with a lot of things. But for the irrational, emotional “please just hold me and make me feel special” things? I don’t know.

So. I just went to my hiding spot for a while. Fucking with pictures. Working on NCs and planning events and sorting through the back end of business things. My favorite. lol. At this point though, most of it is busy work. I don’t have to THINK too hard on any of it, which is perfect for the time being. Hence why writing happened again too.

Whenever I’m feeling really emotional and needy and….attention/affection whore-y I tend to sort of hide myself away for a while so I don’t go stage 5 clinger or overly sensitive. Seriously, expressing emotions to other people is SO FREAKING HARD for me. Especially when I get so scared that the other person will hate me for it. Or that they’ll think I’m being stupid or I don’t know how they’ll react to it.

 

Ahhhhhhh what the hell.

Therapeutic Nonsense

Most of this won’t make a ton of sense, but writing has always been therapeutic to me, and sometimes I just need to get it out, even if I don’t have anyone to talk to about it specifically.

First off….death is weird. Or more specifically, feelings you have when someone else dies can be weird. My sister’s ex-husband passed away today. Which I guess sort of sounds like it shouldn’t affect me that much. And there is this really strange disconnect. I haven’t seen or talked to him in… years and years. But I spent a lot of time around him when I was a kid. He and my sister lived with us for a bit after they got married. He’s the father of my niece and one of my nephews. I have a lot of memories of him. And though I’d never say we were CLOSE in any real sense of the word, and technically he wasn’t “family”, I’m still sad about it. And when I think about my niece and nephew going through losing their father… I almost start to cry. I can’t imagine what they’re going through.

So I’m going through this strange feeling of being sad… but then feeling like maybe I don’t have a “right” to feeling sad. I guess I have this habit of looking at feelings at whether they’re justified or not, rather than just feeling and experiencing them. Which has always been something I’ve done. I can’t really explain it. It’s just a weird feeling. And all my memories of him are so far removed, that they didn’t all come to surface when I found it. Instead of that it’s been a day of random memories popping up when I don’t expect it, when I’m doing other things and feeling ok.

Then I’m already feeling just… emotionally…weird. And some other stuff happens that I am -specifically- trying to separate from my emotions on a regular basis. And I’m actively trying to make sure that I’m not acting out of emotions or bias or personal feelings. And then THAT just makes me feel like I’m doing the opposite. Like, I’m walking on eggshells for fear of seeming emotional or jealous or whatever. It’s an almost daily thing of keeping my feelings in check. And tonight I….did, for the most part. But something bothered me and I spoke up about it to someone. And apparently the way I did it wasn’t phrased the best way. And it spiraled and I just ended up feeling like I was a raging bitch that was being emotional and shitty even when that was specificalllllly what I was trying not to be. And now I just feel…. stupid? I don’t even know if that’s accurate. I feel….not good, let’s just say that.

It’s not a situation where anyone is right or wrong or…anything I don’t think. At least, as far as my opinion. It’s just…. shitty. And I feel shitty. And like all the effort I try to put forth to NOT be shitty is just useless, because apparently I overcompensate. And it’s just me being….emotionally raw and weird today, but I feel horrible. And like I can’t get it right one way or another.

I tried to give examples of what I meant when I say here about overcompensating. That I don’t address things I probably should because I worry that I’d be acting out of personal feelings, or that it would come across that way. And then I get accused of being defensive and of….acting out of personal feelings. I can’t address anyone else doing what this person does, because  don’t see other people do it. If they DO, it’s not when I’m around, or something people have told me about before now. How am I supposed to apply it to them doing things that I don’t know they’re doing? If I saw them doing it, I’d address it. But I just don’t see it happening. I can’t address it if I don’t know it happens.

In this case, I know this person is doing something. It happens a lot. Sure, not as much as it used to, but it still happens. And it happened tonight. But when I tried to vent about how much it annoys me, and how I’m afraid to address it with them because I want to make sure I’m not acting out of personal bias…..I get accused of acting out of personal bias. Or, if that wasn’t the intent, it was how it made me feel. Possibly because I’m already emotionally fucked up today. I dunno. But I just feel like a complete idiot right now. I couldn’t sleep if I tried, so….we get this rambling bit of nonsense.

Busting at the seams.

You ever find out about something that pisses you off SO DAMN MUCH, but there’s nothing you can immediately do about it? That’s how I’m feeling right now. Sometimes people seem to think they’re sneaky. Also, they seem to think the world revolves around them.

Well let me tell you something honey. I’ve been doing my shit for years since before I met you, and I can keep my world right on turning without you in it. AaaaaaaaAAAAaaaAhhHHhhhh….

Seriously. I just want to rage the fuck out. But hey, big picture shit. Somethings need to be handled with care and this is just one of them. But it’s so hard to be nice and professional around this person when now I’ve seen their shit first hand. Bitches think they’re being sneaky and shit.

 

I just want to rant and rave and just scream. To be fair, I probably shouldn’t even be vague-blogging about it, but it’s fucking driving me nuts right now to have to play nice with this person that thinks the sun shines out their ass and more or less implied that I’m useless.

FuuuucCCCKkkkk.

I wanted to post some other shit and pictures from my birthday, but I had to get this out of my system first. I’ll try to write a more coherent and interesting post later instead of this non-specific rage out.